The Suicide Solution

Thirty days ago, Staytember began as an idea. A rebellion. A challenge to survive one breath, one more day, one act of courage at a time. And here we are. Day 30. If you’ve been following along, reading posts, trying prompts, or even just thinking about them, then I need you to hear this: You stayed. Maybe it didn’t look graceful. Maybe you stumbled. Maybe you only “did it” once or twice. None of that matters. What matters is that in those moments, you made a conscious choice. You chose to stay. You chose to survive. That is so fucking brave. Most people will never understand the strength it takes to stare down suicidal thoughts and whisper, “Not today.” They’ll never know the courage it takes to make it through one more breath, one more night, one more day. But you do. And you did. That means you’re already building your “stay muscle.” One rep at a time. And before you know it, the thoughts that once ruled your mind start to lose their grip. Staying becomes your new defa...

This week, I broke down in my car on a dirt road in the mountains. I cried harder than I have in years. Sitting there, looking at myself in the pull-down mirror, I realized the last time I cried like that was around a decade ago, the night I hit the bedroom floor before the shower that saved me. And here I was again. Except this time, I stayed. I knew how to stay. The Truth About Space I feel guilty for needing space. Guilty for wanting time when no one needs me for anything. But when I’m all by myself, I can breathe. No emails, no people, no demands. Just me and silence. And I like that space. It confuses me, because I also love being there for people. I love being needed. But when I don’t carve out time alone, I collapse. My body forces it. My tears remind me that this space cannot be optional. Wanting to Run Away I caught myself thinking, I want to run away. But I don’t want to run from those important to me. What I really want to run away from is my own mind. And honestl...